The posts I'll never write

I had a friend named Kalpa in junior high and high school and I remember being in 8th grade History class with her. I can't seem to recall our teacher's name, but I do remember that he always wrote in all caps and said the phrase "Holy Catfish!" all the time. Kalpa was my intellectual friend and we always talked about the books we should write. "We should write a book that's called The Explanation of [some certain phenomenon for which we had a speculation]!" But of course we never got around to writing those books; the titles just collected. And so the joke was that we needed to write a book about all the books we should write.

I still do the same thing today. I think about all the blogs I could create. (As if I didn't already have enough.) Seriously, though, I'd love to one that's like this or that.

And then I'd have a blog that just lists all my blogs. Elizabeth's bio for me on the wedding site says it all; instead of making all those blogs, I should just have a list of all the blogs I should have.

But I'm not ready for that level of greatness just yet. Today I just have a list of blog posts I'll probably never write. Here are two of them:

• The art of making perfect nachos: how does Cancun do it? A gigantic pile of ingredients atop chips that resist sogginess for the duration of a meal. How they do it is a mystery to me, which is why there will never be a post on it, at least not by me.
• Why learning Photoshop is like raising children. (This would belong on my Analogies blog, of course.) Learning Photoshop is scary; there are so many tools I dare not touch lest I mess everything up. Learning PS and raising children are both complicated yet rewarding, and while playing around you'll find yourself exclaiming, "Wow, I never knew you could do that!" or "Uh oh. Now, how do I get myself out of this mess?!" [Apologies, that was such a needless hyperlink; but I guess it gives you an idea of how much time I waste on Wikipedia...]

So, anyone wanna start a blog with me to write about the posts we'll never write? (Sharon? The address http://unwrittenpost.blogspot.com is still available! And if that's not good enough, so is http://thepostthatwasneverwritten.blogspot.com.)

What about you? What are your unwritten posts about?